I am Shanghai-based Domme Alessandra. Over the past sixteen years, I have designed and executed bespoke BDSM sessions for hundreds of expatriate submissives across China. My time, energy, creativity, and dominance are not commodities; they are highly curated offerings. I do not discount them, and I do not give them away.
Yet, despite this principle, two men earned something no one else ever has: a complimentary BDSM session with me in Shanghai.
This was not generosity. It was not charity. And it was certainly not marketing. It was instinct.
Free Sessions Are Not Rewards—They Are Responses
Many submissives assume that free sessions are something to be “earned” through obedience, loyalty, or persistence. That assumption is fundamentally flawed. Obedience can be trained. Loyalty can be negotiated. Persistence is common.
What cannot be manufactured is authentic erotic chemistry.
In my world, a free session is not a reward for good behavior. It is a response to desire—my desire.
The Swiss Man: From Pegging Client to Pain Slut
The first exception was a Swiss man who initially contacted me for pegging. At the time, there was nothing unusual about his request. Pegging is common; curiosity is abundant.
What distinguished him was not what he wanted—but how he surrendered.
Over time, he revealed a deep appetite for pain, control, and psychological exposure. He did not perform submission; he inhabited it. His reactions were honest, his vulnerability unguarded, and his emotional openness rare. The dynamic that emerged was not transactional—it was organic.
He became my pain slut, and eventually, the only man I have ever dated.
That distinction matters. Our connection moved beyond a professional framework into a private, mutual exploration of desire. The free sessions were not gifts; they were inevitable outcomes of a bond that transcended the usual domme–client structure.
The British Silver Fox: Desire Without Negotiation
The second exception was a British “silver fox” I met in Shanghai.
He did not beg. He did not negotiate. He did not attempt to impress me with fetish lists or scripted submission. Instead, he arrived with a quiet shyness, a visibly disciplined body, and a vulnerability that felt unprotected rather than curated.
There was an undeniable presence about him—something restrained yet deeply erotic. He triggered an immediate, visceral urge in me to dominate him.
I offered him a complimentary session within a limited timeframe after I had done a few long BDSM sessions with him. There were no conditions, no extensions, no reminders. Unfortunately, his demanding professional schedule prevented him from taking advantage of the offer.
Even so, the offer itself remains meaningful: it was made because he awakened something instinctive in me, not because he asked for it.
Why This Will Almost Never Happen Again
These two men did not “earn” free sessions through effort. They earned them by being exactly who they were—at exactly the right moment—without pretense.
I do not advertise free sessions. I do not hint at them. I do not respond to requests for them.
If a submissive must ask, the answer is already no.
Free sessions exist only when my desire overrides my rules. That happens rarely, unpredictably, and solely at my discretion.
A Final Truth for Submissives
If you are seeking a free BDSM session, you are already disqualified.
If, however, your presence naturally provokes a dominant woman's hunger—if your vulnerability is real, your energy undeniable, and your submission unforced—then something rare might happen.
Not because you deserve it.
But because I want it.