China BDSM | My BDSM Outcall To A Spanish Air Captain In Nanjing

I am Shanghai dominatrix Alessandra, a powerful woman in control of her own destiny. I guide men through their deepest desires and fantasies. Over the past 16 years, I’ve had the privilege of meeting many fascinating men, including 10 esteemed air captains who sought to explore BDSM in the most personal, thrilling ways.

A Spanish air captain recently landed in Nanjing and reached out to me for a BDSM outcall, seeking to explore his deepest desires in a safe and consensual manner. He graciously provided me with a luxurious hotel room for our session in Nanjing. I designed an exciting scenario for him, full of anticipation and excitement.

I watched with fascination as he engaged with a blow-up doll, using it as a vessel for his most primal urges. The way he moved, the way he moaned in pleasure, all was a symphony of desire that was intoxicating to witness. And as he approached the verge of orgasm, I decided to introduce a new element to our play — hot wax.

The sizzle of the wax against his skin was electrifying, a sharp contrast to the softness of his previous indulgences. The way he quivered beneath me encouraged me to torture him more, a heady mix of power and pleasure that I had come to crave. And as he finally succumbed to the intensity of his release, I knew that this night would be one to remember.

BDSM Dating: Why I Chose to Date This Man Out Of 600 Submissives In Shanghai

In BDSM, the dynamics between a dominatrix and her submissives are typically professional, built on a foundation of trust, mutual respect, and a shared exploration of fantasies. However, the idea of a dominatrix dating one of her submissives often spells curiosity. How likely is it for such a relationship to blossom beyond the dungeon? Speaking from my personal experience, the odds are exceedingly slim — but not impossible.

Over the past 16 years, I have met nearly 600 submissive men from all over the world. Each one brought their unique fantasies, vulnerabilities, and personalities to our sessions. However, the line between professional and personal has always remained clear for me. My role as a dominatrix is to provide a tailored experience within a safe, consensual framework, not to seek romantic involvement. Yet, there was one exception — a Swiss man who initially contacted me for pegging stands out as my favorite.

A Rare Exception: The Swiss Submissive

Meeting this man was a turning point for me, not because I was looking for romance, but because of who he was. Through our interactions, I recognized him as a truly genuine submissive — not just in his desire to please but in his depth of character. His humility, kindness, intelligence, and sincerity set him apart from the hundreds of others I’ve encountered.

But qualities alone wouldn’t have been enough. What truly made him exceptional was that I also found him deeply sexually attractive. The chemistry was undeniable, and for the first time, I felt compelled to explore what lay beyond the professional boundary. It was a decision I didn’t make lightly, but my intuition told me this was worth pursuing.

The Unlikelihood of Such Connections

When you consider the sheer numbers — nearly 600 submissive men over 16 years — the odds of dating one are astronomically low. That’s not to say I haven’t encountered other wonderful people in my sessions; many of my submissives are kind, respectful, and engaging individuals. However, being a great submissive doesn’t necessarily mean being a great romantic partner, nor does it guarantee mutual attraction.

As a dominatrix, I approach my work with a clear focus on creating tailored experiences, not on seeking romantic involvement. The power dynamics of BDSM are complex, and they thrive within a structured framework. Bringing those dynamics into a romantic context requires a delicate balance that few relationships can sustain.

Why This Connection Worked

So, why did this rare exception work? It came down to a combination of:

Authenticity: His submissive nature wasn’t performative; it was intrinsic to who he was.

Mutual Respect: Beyond the BDSM dynamic, we connected as equals, sharing meaningful conversations and mutual admiration.

Attraction: Without physical chemistry, the relationship wouldn’t have been possible. This was the first time a submissive in my sessions captivated me in that way.

A Reminder of Possibility

While my experience is rare, it serves as a reminder that meaningful connections can emerge in unexpected places. For dominatrices and submissives alike, it’s essential to approach such possibilities with care, ensuring that boundaries, consent, and mutual understanding remain at the forefront.

To anyone wondering whether a dominatrix can date her submissive: the odds are slim, but as my Swiss favorite proves, the heart doesn’t always play by the rules.

Tales from the Dungeon: Unveiling Shanghai's BDSM Drama

 In the fabulous BDSM world, where boundaries are pushed, fantasies are explored, and power dynamics are tested, surprises are not uncommon. However, even the most seasoned dominatrix can be caught off guard by the intensity of a situation that challenges what we understand about submission, power, and connection. One such surprise recently unfolded in my own experience, when I discovered that two men I had been intimately involved with in very different ways—one a 52-year-old submissive I had been dominating for months, and the other a 25-year-old man I had recently introduced to the world of sissification—were father and son.

The First Encounter: A Veteran Submissive

Let's start with the 52-year-old man who had been a regular submissive in my BDSM sessions. He was no stranger to the lifestyle. He had spent years exploring various aspects of domination and submission, always seeking a deeper, more intense experience. Our sessions had been a constant back-and-forth of control and surrender, a space where he could let go of his everyday persona and submit to my authority completely. He craved humiliation and discipline, the kind that would push him past his limits and allow him to reach new depths of orgasm and self-discovery.

In our sessions, I would subject him to rigorous scenarios—sometimes involving bondage, verbal humiliation, and sometimes physical pain—all crafted to break down the walls of his outwardly strong and independent personality. For him, submission wasn't just about physical release; it was about psychological freedom. The control I exercised over him was not just a game—it was a gateway to his deeper, often unspoken, needs.

The Newcomer: A Curious Sissy

Fast forward a few months, and I met him, a 25-year-old man who came to me seeking an entirely different experience. His desires were rooted in feminization and the exploration of his submissive side through sissification. He was nervous and unsure at first, but eager to explore the world of BDSM and submission. Our first meeting was a mix of awkwardness and curiosity, but as we delved into the session, his transformation began.

The dynamic was different with son—where father sought degradation, son craved the experience of being humiliated into a feminized version of himself. It wasn't just about playing dress-up; it was about him losing his identity as a man and being reshaped into a more submissive, feminine persona. He needed to feel small, delicate, and powerless, something that both humiliated him and gave him a sense of freedom in the surrender. The sissy outing, as we called it, was about him embracing his vulnerability and exploring an entirely new form of submission.

Our sessions were a carefully constructed process, allowing the son to explore his newfound femininity and submit to my dominance in a very different way from the father. The contrast between the two men—the son's youthful submission and father's seasoned experience—was striking, and each encounter was unique in its emotional and psychological intensity.

I was wondering when they would find out about each other. Perhaps never.

Why All The Women My Male Submissive Met Lay Silently In Bed For Sex

 The male submissive at my session shared an interesting observation—he claimed that all the women he'd encountered simply lay silently in bed, waiting for sex to unfold. I was taken aback by this, especially considering his attractive appearance and incredibly fit body. One might assume that such qualities would guarantee a more fulfilling experience. It made me wonder: perhaps he's simply been unlucky, perhaps those women weren't right for him, and he was too hesitant to express what he truly needed—a dominant woman, someone unafraid to speak her mind and take control in the bedroom.

But then again, as I reflected on it, I began to wonder: maybe his issues lay elsewhere. Perhaps it wasn't about the women at all. Maybe their silence stemmed from disappointment, not because they were passive, but because his performance left something to be desired. Sex is about connection, power dynamics, and energy—if he couldn't deliver in those areas, no amount of muscle or good looks would make up for it. Maybe, in the end, those women weren't waiting for him to act; they were waiting for him to prove he could.

BDSM Event: Documentary Inspired Pet Play With American Expat Submissive In Shanghai

Recently, an American expat contacted me for a pet play session in Shanghai. For this particular encounter, I drew inspiration from the documentary The Girl Who Talked to Dolphins, which explores the unique bond between a researcher and a dolphin. Inspired by this, I decided to craft an experience where my submissive would take on the role of a dolphin — an obedient, playful creature under my command. I named him Peter for the session, channeling the spirit of the dolphin in the documentary.

I discovered that he had a private swimming pool at his home, the perfect setting for him to fully immerse himself in his new role and bring it to life with authenticity. As soon as he entered the water, I gave him his first command: “Swim for me, Peter.” His body moved with hesitant grace, trying to mimic the fluid, almost instinctive motions of a dolphin. I could see him focus, his eyes locked on mine as I guided him through the space. I could feel the shift in his demeanor as he fell into character, becoming more fluid, more responsive with each movement.

I instructed him to swim in tight circles, his body arching in the water like a dolphin's dorsal fin slicing through the surface. I guided him with my voice, commanding him to dive under the water and resurface, just as a dolphin would do when it feels its owner's presence. I rewarded him with gentle pats and praises when he obeyed, calling him a “good dolphin” and encouraging his submission with each motion. I let the water serve as both a playground and a test of his obedience. The pool became a world where he was stripped of human ego, forced to respond only to my voice and commands.

At times, I coaxed him closer with treats, urging him to leap and “catch” the reward from my hands, like a playful dolphin jumping for fish. I made sure to remind him that his actions were not just for my amusement, but to reaffirm the bond between us. There were moments when I used a whistle to call him, just as a trainer might do to signal a dolphin's performance. He obeyed with precision, his body almost instinctively responding to the sound, as though he truly believed he was under my control, submerged in a world where he was the animal, and I was the dominant force that commanded his every action.

Discreet Public Play: The Swiss Expat's BDSM Journey To Spiritual Happiness In Shanghai

 On a crisp autumn day, the air tinged with the scent of fallen leaves, I received an intriguing message from a Swiss expat in Shanghai yearning for an escape from the mundane. Beneath his professional exterior lay a heart pulsating with the thrill of adventure — a desire to experience a performance that danced along the blurred lines of reality and fantasy.

“Meet me at restaurant XXX at noon,” I instructed, my fingers gliding across the screen of my phone. “Wear the perfume that captures your essence of femininity.”

As I arrived at our venue, I took in the scene around me. The restaurant was a jewel box of elegance, chandeliers twinkling overhead and pastries resembling decadent art pieces. I sat, a vision of dominion in sharp black leather, waiting for my willing servant to arrive.

The door swung open, and he walked in, cloaked in a mix of nervous energy and anticipation. The floral notes of his carefully chosen perfume wafted toward me — subtle yet provocative. He wore more than just scent; he embodied submission, an unspoken devotion expressed through his attire. When our eyes locked, a rush of satisfaction washed over me. “Ah, there he is,” I said, beckoning him closer. “You smell delightful.”

With a flourish, I ordered an extravagant lunch — a feast of rich flavors destined to evoke indulgence. As we dined amidst laughter and the clinking of cutlery, I playfully instructed him to scroll through stimulating porn videos on his phone. I teased, “immerse yourself in your porn while we feast. Let the world around us fade into mere shadows of your pleasure.”

As lunch transformed into an interlude, the distant echoes of laughter faded, replaced by his soft gasps and flushed skin. I relished my power, watching him balance on the edge of humiliation and ecstasy, wrapped in the energy we wove together.

Once we finished our meal, I led him to a tranquil park, its landscape a canvas of vibrant autumn leaves and rustling trees — a perfect backdrop for our next act. “Now comes the fun part,” I smirked, retrieving a shiny gold golf club from my big bag — a striking contrast to the natural beauty surrounding us. “You will kneel here.”

As he descended onto the soft grass, surrendering to my command, I felt invigorated. Each tap against his skin became a symbol of trust and mutual respect. The strokes were measured — an exhilarating dance we both understood intimately.

“Count them for me,” I instructed playfully.

With each precise smack, punctuated by his soft breaths and gasps, he journeyed deeper into this shared world of sensation.

“Good boy,” I whispered, pride swelling within me each time he obeyed without hesitation, our connection strengthening with each exchange.

There were no prying eyes in the park, no one who understood the language spoken between us — the intimacy of vulnerability wrapped in public spectacle.

As the session drew to a close, I pulled him close and offered him a lush apple from my bag — an emblem of gratitude and reward. “You did beautifully today,” I stated firmly, then whispered sweet nothings while stroking his hair.

I held his face and looking into his eyes illuminated by newfound freedom and exhilaration, I knew that we would meet again.